Of starry tantrums

With every single day I can feel the enormity of my jinxing capacity.

I can take care of you, love you like a hopeless maniac, pamper you rotten, take all your temper tantrums with a calm smile, be there for you even before you need me, walk away the second I sense you tossing and turning for space, I can be a mother, daughter, lover and friend; all till I know that you are not in any ways related to me.

It's like, the moment we get tied up as a pair, I’ll start affecting you. My jinxed existence will start affecting you. The blighted luck that I have, will show it effects on you as well. And that is The Last thing I want to happen.

I wonder what made me pray, cry and hope in despair so that you could be mine. I'm glad you aren't. I'm glad we'll never cross that line and reach that point of proximity. I 'm glad you didn't give in to my temper tantrums, my very own sweet custard.

I would have felt so helpless and I would have been so sore with myself for being a part of your life. I like it this way. I'm there....just close enough to get a daily inventory of what's happening in your life...if your leg is giving you problems, if you've finally stopped fasting on Saturday ( yes, that bothers me...anything that makes you uncomfortable for 2 seconds at a stretch bothers me. I haven't told you this to avoid another 2 seconds of discomfort). I'm there, and the daily inventory, abuses, mollycoddling, helps me survive through each day.

I hope my stars are screwed up enough to not let any one come close... we don't want the responsibility of ruining someone else's life, do we!